Monday, December 19, 2005

Not Dancing

It is a feature or necessity of a Bedouin tent that the protecting outer flaps and layers are separate from those that enclose the inner chambers. This allows me to stand and watch the dancing and trysting maneuvers and ploys of the Sheik and harem wantabe's.

I guess I have always been on the outside looking in at these things. In high school I was sorta gangly and flat-chested, but still could have gone to more proms had I not been trained that I could not refuse a date request, even from George, except by not going at all. In college my growth reversed itself and I then received attention from those who didn't know my name before. I reluctantly went to a nightclub where a former football hero approached and said he would like to get to know me better. He was looking at my chest at the time, and I shocked my friends by saying, "Well I am up here, not down there. Try again when you are a little taller."

It was sometimes a problem protecting the girls from men. Sadly, there are those who feel that any female who is unattractive and even deformed should be so appreciative of attention that they will put up with abusive attention. 'quoise could have held here own at any performance before a Sheik or king, but was protected by here innocence and sharp elbows and instinct. She was once arrested for breaking a man's finger that was in her bra at the time. The judge let her off because she is 'retarded' and didn't know any better.

I divorced my former "mister wonderful" when it turned out he had lied about wanting children. Turned out that he had several un-named children already. Obviously the woman's fault. He saw no inconsistency in not want "legal" children, while feeling free knock up anyone for free. Maybe if I had gone to more dances I would have known better. But if I did choose to seek another man in my life I wouldn't use a dance card. Does anyone know of a spiritual and moral credit app anywhere?



At 1:28 PM, Blogger le Enchanteur said...

Ah now Nessie my dear, you are right to point out the perils of dancing with dark haired, bearded strangers.

However, I did meet my partner of thirty seven years on the dance floor in our local Town Hall. To think I got in the car with a complete stranger and let him bring me home.

Your words also remind me of the fellow who partnered me at a University ball and was so drunk that I wouldn't let him drive me home. I rang a taxi.

Then there were the country balls when we danced the barn dance, changing partners. Darryl tells me how he loved those dances and the chance to dance with women who normally might refuse the honour.

It is a problem protecting girls from men with bad intentions. The vulnerable don't always know how to discern when danger is afoot. We are all guilty of giving mixed messages. Telling children to beware of stranger then letting strange men come down the chimney at Christmas.

Our Sheik may not be perfect but I assure you all, he is an honorable man. It is quite safe to have 'a dance' with him. When I had my turn I remembered dancing with my father at the country New Year's Eve ball, dancing with Darryl at that Town Hall all those years ago and went all misty.

At 4:39 PM, Blogger Imogen Crest said...

Thanks both of your for these posts, pointing out social wisdom, the ambiguities of life. It also shows there are two sides to most things, and the value of women's talk.

At 1:34 AM, Blogger Gail Kavanagh said...

"Well I am up here, not down there. Try again when you are a little taller."
And good on `quoise - no less than an unmannered brute deserves.
Dances used to be a way of bringing people together and even at their most lame (Scotland: from a scruffy young man goaded on by his mates - ``hey, Queen, you gerrin' up?") I feel they had a lot more to offer than the pubs and clubs today. Many young men back then did actually pride themselves on their ability to whirl a girl around a dance floor, rather than just acting as if the mere fact they see you exist and deign to think you worthy of their attention is enough.

At 4:45 AM, Blogger Lois said...

What with poor Nessie in peril,
le Enchanteur hoping for a bloke to come down her chimney(He will have to be skinny).

Reminiscences with Darryl and his boyhood days at country dances,and his cheeky ways of asking Heather if he could take her home, and not even on the first date...what a boy...

Dancing with our Dads.

Womens talk being valuable.

Gail heaping it on this ill mannerered brute of a man and agreeing with her that the Old Days were better than those of today....

Enough there for a good book me thinks......Lois 22-12-05


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